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30 October 2008

chinese translation



waiting outside in the fresh air. finally. done with work for the day. finally.
m.ward singing into my soul. finally. the open window on the TARC. finally.
"chinese translation" is exactly what i needed today. a word spoken into my fear.

"I once was a young man just like you,
aFraId
to do the things that
I knew I had to do.
So I played an escapade
just like
you."


playing an escapade. that is so perfect for me in regards to my work right now. i'm truly just filling a role, and it's certainly causing me to disconnect from the parts of me that i love MOST. i understand and value the role that i play, it fulfills some parts of me, but i LOVE the part i feel like i'm losing, and i value them MORE. so i'm constantly trying to hang onto them as much as possible. i LOVE moments like this afternoon when i can feel my WHOLE universe holding onto STEPHANIE STEPHANIE, not stephanie in disguise; i am reminded and blessed and so lifted. thank you thank you


first thing i did when i got home this beautiful fall afternoon is make emile & maria's anniversary card (to M from E).

i love it, turned out BEAUTIFULLY i think. i love them- i just love love love them, and living .5 miles away from them has been wonderful beyond my understanding. i trust them both and know our friendships will be so much stronger for this season of closeness. they LOVE paul. i LOVE paul. it works out SO so great. happy third anniversary to you all!




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