lately my inner critic has been spouting off quite a bit. it's loud and it is distracting. it is also, while i would wouldn't like to admit it, prevalent. some of the message are:
- you need to be a better listener.
- you need to express yourself as adequately as you pout.
- you need to have it all figured out.
- you need to tone your abdominal area.
- you need to practice being more present.
- you need to get up in the morning. on time.
- you need to take better care of yourself.
- you need all your friends to know you care about them.
- you need to...the list goes on and on.
as you can imagine, these messages have left me feeling restless, inadequate, and honestly, a bit lost inside myself. it comes at a strange time, because finally there are many strong winds of change blowing about in my life (more on that soon), but instead of reserving my energy, i'm blowing fuses all over the place. i'm creating & losing battles from within.
i like to call these voices the inner critics. they are a panel of mean, hateful, bitter judges. they love to compare, deceive, criticize, and overwhelm. they are not constructive, compassionate, or thoughtful.
i have decided i am going to whip them into shape. they can serve me, but they are going to change if that's the case. a few weeks ago, after finishing "I Thought it Was Just Me" by the lovely Brene Brown, I whipped up this journal page:
the text reads:
"on the royal throne of life, we are, (without a doubt), our own worst critic. sure, there are mean co-workers and unfair peers, but in the END we learn from them. the bully teaches you to tuck your milk money in a safe place; your local weather(wo)man teaches you about 1980's fashion. but the inner bully? the forecaster who already creates a storm within? they will teach you nothing worth remembering...but they will scare and shame you. THE CRITICS. it's their job to keep you locked up in judgement."
What does your panel of inner critics have to say? What is valid and what is bullshit? What do you do to tame the inner beast and bless the inner spirit? I would love to hear about your ways, your practices, your mantras and your inner panel. I think to myself: "I can't possibly be the only one!" So can you confirm that?
Everyone chooses these voices, chooses to silence them or let them shout. I am in the process of choosing the ones I want. I am the judge: I will only invite who I want on that panel and they will say what I want them to say.