06 January 2011

holding space for intention {letting go of fear}

there is a decent amount of pressure at the beginning of each new year, to carve out an intention, to look deep within and evaluate, in a meaningful way, the truth of ones inner landscape. what's working and what's not.  while this effort can be as serious or as lighthearted as you please, in the true seeing, there is an epiphany. 

sneak peek of my 2011 pictures, taken by victoria wall

when we hold up the mirror in our lives, take account of the way things are, the stories we tell ourselves, the outcome of this honest evaluation can scare us. shake us. cause us to reconsider whether taking a deep look was ever a good idea in the first place. and the opposite is also true: we can play charades with our real selves. allowing our true intentions to be masked with others' opinions. remember this: the beauty is in the discovery.

that's how i felt last year when i laid out the intention to live out my golden year. the gremlin who's mantra is "and who do YOU think YOU are?" showed up in full force. but instead of shudder back in fear, i didn't something i'm not sure i'd ever done before: i stood my ground. i knew my needs and i wasn't turning back. uncomfortable? terribly. terrifying? in every way. worth it? hell yes.

there is something about an intention that strikes me as too simple to believe in its effectiveness.  and i admit i had my doubts last year. but my goodness, what a golden year. 

i can't thank you enough for traveling with me through that journey. for sharing in the celebrations & the challenges. for showing up when i was distant, for braving chill & warmth, energy & exhaustion. for sending me along my way even when the way was unclear. i thank my lucky stars, the good god, the spirit of love that leads us all. i am undoubtedly grateful in so many ways. 

and now: 2011 is here. you're here and i'm here and its time {again! already? so soon?!} for intention.  i am not sure any year will every be like my golden year: which was something between the 1849 California Gold Rush and the exact definition of re·fine·ment/riˈfīnmənt/Noun 1. The process of removing impurities or unwanted elements from a substance.

but i do know this: we can be ready for whatever will find its way into our lives. because we can trust this process. collectively, we can know that we were meant for these dreams, and lean so trustingly into the unknown, seeking support from one another as we live out these well-meant intentions.

so as i spent just another day or so carving mine out, you can know that i'm holding space for yours, too. 

1 comment:

lacy said...

absolutely beautiful words and a stunning photo-- it says so much in it's simplicity! You are such a beauty!